Tonight is the Winter Solstice…definitely one of my favorite holidays of the year! Each year Bret and I celebrate the Winter Solstice by making “intention logs” and burning them in a bonfire on the night of the Solstice. We make snacks, hot toddies and treats for the dogs and we all bundle up and sit outside around the fire. We start out making our “intention logs” during the day…some call them yule logs…we write all over the logs our respective wishes/goals for the coming year and then wrap them in spices/herbs from my garden.
This year…things are different…we need to shed the last year like we have never felt before…it will be so nice to symbolically burn away 2020. I personally have a totally different feeling about “intentions” for 2021 though. I have been thinking long and hard the last few weeks about what my goals/wishes are for the coming year…I’ve felt a bit lost all year. I am generally a very driven person…my goals are usually centered around building my businesses. I love working and building things and yes…with no shame I will say I love making money…it has always been fun to me to run businesses. Honestly…this year has been such a drain that it doesn’t seem important or fun right now. It took me awhile to figure out that it is perfectly ok to throw in the towel on some things for now. So this year my intentions are very different from my norm. My intentions for 2021 aren’t my usual driven goals at all but instead they are “playing, cooking, gardening, dog momming and pawtying, returning to music (piano and cello), crafting, painting and relaxing”….I just don’t care about working anymore…nor being stressed out about things I can’t control. I wish the coming year to bring only peace and happiness…everything else needs to be noise. I’ve spent my whole life working at a feverish pace…its time to let it go and relax. I literally cannot wait for our bonfire tonite…burning away 2020 and embarking on a much different and better 2021. Merry Solstice.
Update on Miss Millie….
The last few weeks have been very difficult for Millie. We knew something was not right with Millie for weeks. I took her to the vet weeks ago with only…”something isn’t right…she is slow on her walks…she is sleeping too much…she is not bossing me around.” Our vet thought it was related to degenerative disc disease and the pain associated with it. Despite aggressive treatment for several weeks Millie’s back issue was deteriorating and she was quickly losing the use of her back legs. Unfortunately in the midst of all of this we also found out that Millie had a really bad case of glaucoma in her right eye (an eye that has been a problem since we adopted her 4 years ago). It was a situation that escalated very rapidly and was incredibly painful for her.
Last Monday we were faced with the decision to either have her eye removed or say goodbye. In spite of the fact that I have to make decisions like this over and over for our Misfits…I still agonize over it every time. My inner bell told me Millie was not ready to go yet. Her eye was successfully removed last Monday. Despite her age and co-morbidities…Millie sailed through her surgery. The first few days after her surgery were very rough for her…sleepless nights, lots of meds and constant snuggling. But she has bounced back like a little champ. On Saturday, to the surprise of all of us, Millie started walking again…her back legs appear to be coming back with her zest for life…at first she was very wobbly but each day she is getting stronger. She is bossing me around non-stop again…this makes me so happy. We feel so incredibly blessed…both Bret and I feared the worst for several weeks…but here we are. Millie is an incredibly special dog to us…she is an amazing pet and friend…there are no words for how happy we are that she is on the mend and has her spirit back.
The morning I took Millie to the vet to discuss removing her eye…my husband…as usual said I support whatever you think Millie needs before I left with her. Shortly after I arrived at the vet clinic…he texted me this picture…a rainbow had formed over Misfit Manor…his message was “everything is going to be ok”… and it was.
The best part of Solstice is Solstice…
It is hard to believe that it is one year ago today that Solstice became a permanent Misfit. After weeks of living in our yard last year…and Bret and I doing the due diligence on figuring out where she came from…we officially adopted Miss Solstice. She is such an amazing blessing…beautiful, naughty, playful and super snuggly. She is asleep on my desk right now as I right this…I am overwhelmed with gratitude that she found her way to us. Winter Solstice will always have special meaning to our family because of her.
Adios to 2020…
Like most people…we can’t wait for 2020 to end. It has been horrible. So much has been lost…so many people have suffered…my business was decimated…I have generally lost my faith in people and retreated to a whole new level of introversion. But it is nearly over…2021 I believe will be very different in many ways for all of us. For me…the Solstice marks the new year…I am glad it is here…The Misfits and I wish you a blessed Solstice and look forward to happier times.